one month...

We have one month before we leave Cambodia. One month of the sights and sounds of the streets. One month of the dirt and the rain and the dirty rain. One month of lizards in our trash cans and bats in our bedrooms. One month of flooded homes and streets. One month of three dollar meals and fifty cent beers. One month of pushing hard and making the most of the opportunities we have, and I hope we can make it.

Cambodia is a bit of an ass-kicker. It is hot, our stomachs are constantly gurgling from something we ate or drank. The danger of the roads is ever present and the cultural stress is vice-like. I think I may feel a sense of relief when our plane lifts off and the patterned rice fields turn to a sea of brown land as we depart from 30,000 feet. This sounds crazy but to be honest, Cambodia is really hard. What Leanne and I have been a part of has been rich and significant but it has also been challenging and stretching and even on some days, a bit unnerving.

For Leanne and I, living in Cambodia has not been the simple fulfillment of a desire for some quarter-life adventure. It was a calculated move that required us to uproot from great jobs, loving families and dear friends. We are different now because of what we have experienced in some ways better and in some ways worse. We worry about our reactions about home, our relationships with friends and our expectations for our jobs. We are concerned about what it will look like when we land for good, not just as visitors.

We will be busy for our last 31 days with graduations and goodbyes. We will turn over programs and projects to people who will take them further than we ever could and we will walk out of offices and a home that are as important to us as any other has ever been. This will be a challenge.

Two weeks ago I asked Leanne, "what do we do when we land in Denver, where do we start?" And she calmly explained to me, "just like each day here, we will wake up and continue, having faith that we will be taken care of on that day." That is my prayer for each of the next 31 days and beyond. To wake up, praise God for what he has provided and continue to walk in his ways. If we can do that then there is nothing to worry about.